Watch and pray

It surprises me how quickly the suffering in Gethsemane is covered in the gospels. It seems almost before you can begin to ponder the importance it's over and Peter is swinging around that sword. I find myself compelled to read on, I don't know if I just want the end to be over, or if I'm afraid of lingering in the Garden with the suffering Christ.

Jesus' own apostles failed to recognize the importance. Now of course, we see all the signs Jesus gave to them that pointed to his suffering and death. Sometimes it almost seems that the gospel writers emphasize how little the disciples understood. But are we any better? I am guilty of sleeping through scripture study, prayers, church meetings, and other sacred worship meetings. My mind will wander when participating in sacraments.

The atonement has been the subject of countless books, talks, sermons and testimonies. But maybe most importantly, it has been the subject of quiet, intimate, personal worship moments of all true Christians. As relating to the Canon in whole, maybe the Savior wanted the garden to receive a minimal amount of attention. The most sacred experiences we have should be shared sparingly, protected from misuse, and overuse.

Naively I think I expect a deeper discussion, or boldface type, or at least a dedicated chapter to the supernal act that changed the course of all existence.

The unfamiliar and the unbeliever must focus, almost entirely, on Jesus' acts and teachings before they can understand and appreciate what happened on the Mount of Olives. Thankfully the Bible didn't turn out the way I would have written it.


What of the sleeping disciples? How do we open ourselves to temptation when we fail to watch and pray? Wouldn't the disciples have noticed the saviors angst when he spoke to them? At a stone's cast distance, it seems the three chosen apostles would have been able to see the agony, or at least the angel had they been alert. I'm reluctant to believe that the sleep itself is the condemning act (not to excuse myself).

If Christs suffering was infinite and eternal, can't we assume that it extends into each moment, both forward and backward from that night thousands of years ago. Suddenly I imagine the worst moments of my life playing out just yards away from my precious Savior kneeling and begging that I be forgiven for what I am doing. When I let my eyes droop, even though my spirit be willing, if I succumb to the flesh I'm oblivious. Time and time again He comes to me, gently wakes me and asks me to watch just a little longer, and instants later I am back, drowning in my selfish dreams while He goes on without me.

I don't want to be there any more.

Every day it's as if I skim the scriptures and miss the atonement verses, but every day I have the chance to try again. I want to learn to commune, to worship. I want to be able to watch through the hour and see myself as a support to the Savior in His work.

To Stand

Sometimes it seems like being... good or righteous is so hard. It seems like there is a long list of "don't"s that we can't possibly avoid, and a longer list of "do"s that we couldn't even approach accomplishing.

I think some scriptures are there to inspire us with our potential, and some are there to help comfort us in our frailty.

One resonating scripture for me is Ephesians 6.

Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

To stand. God expects us to battle Satan, in all his forms, but we don't need to make some great showing, we don't need a body count, or proof of ground gained. When it's all done, we just need to be able to stand.

In the story of the prodigal son (sorry to beat this one to death), the Savior says "For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found" And that was worthy of joy and merry making. He doesn't say "this my son is successful," or "accomplished." Alive, found. Those are pretty meager qualifications for bringing our father joy.

"Ask," "knock," "open your ears," "come," "follow." He is willing to do all the work. Behold, I will go before you and be your rearward; I will fight your battles. the Lord thy God shall lead thee by the hand All He requires are things like faith, trust, hope and humility.

Prodigal Son Contd

I mentioned my previous comment (that the prodigal lost any increase to his inheritance) in a class, and it seemed to have been taken as if he lost his exaltation. I don't see it like that, to me what the faithful gained and what the prodigal lost is what the Lord in the Doctrine and Covenants calls "the drop." To me, exaltation in this story is analogous to coming home to the father's house, both were home. The calf, the robe and the ring, were all just blessings. In this case temporal, in our case many of them would be spiritual.

CS Lewis said:

A silly idea is current that good people do not know what temptation means. This is an obvious lie. Only those who try to resist temptation know how strong it is... A man who gives in to temptation after five minutes simply does not know what it would have been like an hour later. That is why bad people, in one sense, know very little about badness. Mere Christianity

I would assume that similarly, greater blessings are allotted to those who withstand temptations.


Another thought came to me during our class discussion when I looked closer at the gifts. The son was destitute, if he couldn't feed himself, he would surely be dressed in rags. His father gave him a cloak and shoes, it was the best cloak, but it was just a cloak. The ring on his finger might not decoration. I don't know much about Jewish history and traditions, but I know in many cultures rings were symbols of the family with crests etc. The father may not have been trying to decorate his son, as much as claim his son. Let the prodigal, and everyone else know, that he would not be received as a mere servant, but he was in fact his father's son and welcome in his house. Since the son was envious of pig feed, he was probably emaciated and malnourished. It may have taken the fatted calf to help restore his son's health.

When we repent, when we turn back to God, even when we are "yet a great way off" He will run to us. He will spiritually cover us, protect us from the rocks and dust and weather we have passed, and will guide us home. He will proudly claim us as His children and he will fill us with the best He has to offer.

It might seem unfair that the newly repented seem to get so much so quickly, just as with the older son. His problem (and our problem) is forgetting our blessings. Elder Holland said,

this dutiful son—and he is wonderfully dutiful—forgets for a moment that he has never had to know filth or despair, fear or self-loathing. He forgets for a moment that every calf on the ranch is already his and so are all the robes in the closet and every ring in the drawer. He forgets for a moment that his faithfulness has been and always will be rewarded.

He hadn't gone naked. His feet hadn't been bruised, torn and battered by walking miles shoeless. He hadn't felt the deep loneliness his brother experienced, not lost his family, friends, wealth and personal identity. While his brother had lost all these things he had been earning more clothes and calves and money and friends.

We might feel a little resentful when someone seems showered in blessings. They may get a close relationship with family members or priesthood leaders. Maybe people go out of their way to befriend them, or they get a calling that we have always wanted. It might seem that they don't deserve the blessings that they are receiving. While it might be true that they didn't work for these blessings, they did pay for the blessings. Pain, sorrow, embarrassments that the faithful, thankfully, don't have to endure.

It usually seems so easy to find things to complain about, but when I really look at my life, I can see that I am blessed so much more than I deserve. Especially when blessings come gradually it can be easy to ignore, forget, or even expect the blessings that we have, so that we don't recognize them as the gifts that they are. Next time I find myself sulking just within earshot of someone else's party, I hope I can quickly check myself and head in singing.

Prodigal Son

First, let's get this one out of the way.

Prodigal:

• extravagant: recklessly wasteful; "prodigal in their expenditures"
• a recklessly extravagant consumer
  wordnet.princeton.edu/perl/webwn
• A prodigal person, a spendthrift; wastefully extravagant; someone yielding profusely, lavish; profuse, lavishly abundant
  en.wiktionary.org/wiki/prodigal
• recklessly extravagant: characterized by wasteful expenditure: lavish: yielding abundantly: luxuriant: profuse
  www.terran-associates.com/nz-business-defs.php

(courtesy google definitions)

Something I had never realized, or thought of before, is that that the father says to the older, indignant responsible son "all that I have is thine." (Luke 15:31)

The young reckless son no longer had any claim to his inheritance. Once the prodigal cashed out, 100% of the increase went directly to the other son. Even after the prodigal son returned.

Maybe sin is more costly than we think. Maybe as we turn away from God, we loose countless blessings that are reserved only for the faithful. Previously Jesus had explained how the Angels of God will rejoice over the sinner that repents, but this parable might give the context for the celebration. In the parable they rejoice when the son "repents" but all of the increase is given to the faithful son, and the son who fell away has to start over--alone.

My Doctrine

Jesus answered them, and said, My doctrine is not mine, but
his that sent me. ... He that speaketh of himself seeketh his own
glory: but he that seeketh his glory that sent him, the same is true, and no unrighteousness is in him

I started this blog a little tongue in cheek, and I really don't mean to be light about the scriptures, my faith (or anyone else's).

Let me start by giving the background as I understand it. The Jews canon was based on the Law and the Prophets. Moses gave the Law and form there, Joshua to Malachi were the words of the prophets. But, if I remember correctly there was a lot of commentary made on the Old Testament, that made up much of the rigid traditions etc, and I assume deliminated the different sects like the Sadducees and Pharisees, formed the basis for the Sanhedrin etc.

That would have been the unofficial divisive and often incorrect part of the then Jewish religion and lifestyle. And would have been the goal of any aspiring Rabbi. When Jesus decried those that advocated their own gospel, I don't think, I hope that my blog would not be part of that group.

A major part of essentially all organized religion, and specifically that established throughout the scriptures emphasize collaborative learning of the gospel. Sunday school, seminaries and institutes, the School of the Prophets, conferences, council meetings etc. Blogging might be a little unorthodox, but I think it is a valid means to share, not my doctrine, but to share my thoughts, my feelings, and my questions on His doctrine.

In trying to decide where the separation line would be, I first tended to think that anything that claimed to be definitive would be at fault. But I believe that many inspired scholars and leaders might have definitive interpretations of the scriptures. So maybe the line is that of stewardship. Someone claiming the final word for a little flock that they are not implicitly called and ordained to lead, might be at risk of proclaiming their own gospel, rather than that of 'Him who sent them'.

My definitely indefinite writings are more for my own benefit than anything else. I put them in a public venue in the hopes that someone might stumble upon them and find something interesting, helpful, amusing, or at least thought provoking. But I do give all the honor, and the credit, to God, the Spirit, and the inspired writers of the things I read. I'm just here for the ride ;)

Only Begotten

Isn't it interesting that Adam isn't considered a begotten son of God?

These stones

Luke 3"God is able of these stones to raise up children unto Abraham"

We talked recently about Jesus walking on the water. Peter did the same and Jesus said that he had little faith. That scripture has haunted me. Honestly I think I am afraid of my potential. If that is a little faith, what could we do if we have... moderate faith, what if we have a lot of faith?

The implications I think are a little frightening.

What this specifically has me thinking about though is control of the elements. One of Jesus' first miracles was to physically, chemically change water to wine. He was able to walk on water, he could have changed stone into bread, God is able to make Jews out of rocks, Moses brought water from stone, parted the Red Sea, changed the Nile's water to blood. Elijah stopped the heavens, and stayed the sun. Faith can move mountains. Literally.

Why? How? Joseph Smith speaking at King Follett's funeral asked those present to pray that the wind would die down so that everyone could hear. "For the effectual prayers of the righteous avail much. There is strength here"

We know that in the "last days" that there will be much physical, elemental destruction. Floods, earthquakes, famines, fires, pestilences. All of these seem to have controlled directly by prophets at some time. Will they all come down upon us because of the general lack of faith. Noah's flood for that matter, came at a time when there was only a handful of people good enough to save.

That brings to mind another question I have had rolling around in my head. As a missionary I memorized Doctrine and Covenants Section 2.

1 Behold, I will reveal unto you the Priesthood, by the hand of Elijah the prophet, before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the Lord.
2 And he shall plant in the hearts of the children the promises made to the fathers, and the hearts of the children shall turn to their fathers.
3 If it were not so, the whole earth would be utterly wasted at his coming.

We recited that, and I found myself wondering... "Why" Why would the earth be wasted at his coming if our hearts were not turned to our fathers? Someone suggested that by wasted it meant the earth would not have served its purpose, but the Portuguese translation says destruido--destroyed.

I don't know the answer, but now I wonder, what if the earth would tend naturally towards destruction, what if the only thing holding it together is the faith of the righteous. The spirit of Elijah is powerful, and the Priesthood restored by him more so. Maybe if all that was lacking, on the great and terrible day, there wouldn't be enough faith to keep the earth in tact.

Do we have an obligation to learn to control the elements? Many modern prophets have encouraged us to pray for rain. Lorenzo Snow famously spoke of the correlation between tithes and rain in St. George Utah. Should we be able to "Call down" mild summers? Are natural disasters a sign of a collective lack of faith?